Chocolate Valentine’s Day Roses

Enduring naff chocolate is an occupational hazard on this blog. But it seems Firebox is the source of so many unhappy chocolate moments for me The hideous experiences that the Bite The Bullet, Magic Choc, chocolate Pop Tarts, Space Food and the Wafer Thin Mints have given me the view that you should only buy chocolate from a chocolate shop – the only exception that proves the rule was the bacon chocolate bar. I just don’t know what made me think it could ever be a good idea to spend £9.99 of my hard-earned money to buy four of these chocolate roses. And more importantly I don’t know what made Firebox think it would be a good idea to up the ante and sell a dozen of them for £41.99!

For a tenner you could buy five of Paul A Young’s house collection or four of the most insipid, sweet, kitsch, naff-looking Valentine’s gifts you’re ever likely to find. The chocolate used here reminds me of the most cheapest, buy 10 for the price of 1 Eater eggs that you’ll find in those going out of date Pound shops you find in ever increasing numbers filling up the high street. I know Firebox loves to sell gimmicky stuff – I’ve certainly spend £100’s in their over the past decade, but they normally label stuff as “naff” or “kitsch” of that’s exactly what the product is. But here they state that it’s “A wonderful gift for Valentine’s Day” – err, no it’s not. It’s the type of gift somebody who’d buy an Asda Smart Price Valentine’s card would buy!

My wife loves rubbish chocolate, but even she’ll say this is revolting. There’s not much else I can say, other than perhaps have a think of what else Firebox sells that may be a bit more appropriate?

It doesn’t even deserve a rating other than being put in the “avoid” category along with Café-Tasse Extra Noir, Sainsbury’s Brownies, Chocolate Cigarettes, Canderel Dark Chocolate and Prestat Choxi Mint Dark Chocolate. If you really want to run the risk of getting dumped on Valentine’s Day then these might be a good gift to get. Either that or they got you a Boyzone CD last year and you just have to get them back!

Where To Buy These Chocolate Covered Roses


Image © Kieron Donoghue

Lee McCoy

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